Starting to Understand

Having finished a book I suppose I saw it fit to start another one... "Teenage Guys" by Steve Gerali... I found it in the group home I'm working in and thought it would be insightful. Why I write this particular blog is twofold: 1) to help me better retain what I read through sharing it and processing though it and 2) to perhaps share something meaningful/useful to/for others... Hopefully I will not break any kind of copyright law or anything of the sort... I should also add that I'd be quite happy if you should decide to e-mail me or contact me in any other way so as to discuss the type of things written here. (If you'd like a further information on this book, i.e. Bibliography, Just let me know).

-Aristotle saw young adolescent males as, "egocentric, idealistic, passionate, quick-tempered and easily angered, impulsive, overly optimistic, gullible, lacking self-control, and driven by their sexual desires." (pg. 19) According to Gerali he was decently close to the mark.
-Three basic "categorizes" or age groups: Early Adolescence (about 11-14); Middle Adolescence (14-17); and Late Adolescence (18-13).
-Early: rapid growth in stature, seemly reckless energy, becoming very self-aware and are learning about who they are. Still tend to be back and forth between little boy and adolescent behavior
-Middle: More "body aware" as their stature begins to fill out, most feel there is something abnormal about their physical appearance. Tend to develop a "bravado" mentality that internalizes their masculine identity. Strength, physically and emotionally (the suppression of emotion), and status define this identity. Develops new confidences (i.e. invincibility, desire for adventure) but overall unstable.
-Late: Begins (with difficulty) to define himself as a Man. More aware of need to become responsible. "Late-adolescent guys desperately seek out, consciously or subconsciously, strong male mentors." (p. 24) Become more aware of deficiencies in their fathers sometimes resulting in a woundedness. "...internalization of values; strong male bonding; sexual awareness, desire, lust, and hormonal overdrive... at times a greater desire to be well-rounded ethically, morally and spiritually." (p. 24)
-In each stage a guy needs to develop certain "developmental tasks" (formation of attitudes, values, behaviors, and skills transitioning him from boyhood to manhood). Sadly, Western culture has few "rites of passage" for teenage guys.
-5 specific dimensions to a person: physical, emotional, intellectual, social, and spiritual (moral/ethical). Frequency of repressed emotions can lead to serious repercussions in the quality of a young person's life and relationships. Need to help guys understand the influences family and friends have on their identity. The stage in which morals, values and beliefs are formed.

Of speical note to me is the way in which these young people look so much for a mentor. They look up to those a bit older then them and are in high gear processing through who they should be. Along with that is the way in which morals, values, and beliefs are formed during this stage... what an awesome responsabilty to live our lives in such a way as to set these people on the right track!

Tip for youth workers (from book):
Be quick to notice and to, one-on-one, verbally affirm character qualities that distinguish a guy and qualitative... it becomes a "coming of age" moment for a guy.